Zombieland – Review

Before Zombieland, I was that type of guy, who would space off from time to time, and fantasize about a zombie apocalypse. Some days I would look around seeing people walking aimlessly in the mall, or pumping gas, or yelling at their spoiled brat who was crying because they wouldn’t buy him or her that toy, and just wish for a good old zombie outbreak. Things like losing my loved ones and how would I get food never crossed my mind. Instead I would think of unique ways to kill a zombie, or doing retarded stuff for enjoyment like crash expensive cars, smashing TVs at Best Buy, and finding that one last pretty girl, and telling her we need to start up the human race and procreate, even though I forgot to mention to her that there is a place full of survivors. Yeah, I know, I’m weird. Now you know why it took me eight years to get my BA from college…in art.

This brings me to Zombieland. Some how, the screenwriters-Rhett Reese and Paul Wernick-overheard my little zombie apocalypse dream and turned it into a script.

Zombieland is a full-on blast of a film. Funny, charming, scary, damning social commentary from the Romero films, it’s just an eighty minute fun house of a picture. Leading the charge is Woody Harrelson as Tallahassee, a full-blown cowboy of a zombie killer, and the best thing he has done in years. I know, I’ve liked him in a lot recently, but he’s just a scene-stealing, fast talking, S.O.B., that will have people quoting him and wishing to be him. Bravo for this casting choice. Jesse Eisenberg has been treading the copycat waters of Michael Cera for a bit now, and it was getting tiresome, but here, he really is a lot of fun. He’s the nerd that you think would be the first to die in a zombie apocalypse because he’s so wimpy, but he ends up matching Tallahassee word-for-word, kill-for-kill, and because of that he is living my dream. Damn him. Truth be told, he “and-one’s” me by getting the best type of girl, Emma Stone.

So, the last paragraph wouldn’t succeed if it wasn’t for the script. Zombieland doesn’t really try to say anything, other than Zombieland Rule #32: Enjoy the little things, and outside of Romero, the social commentary put on zombies was wearing thin. What’s left to say, really? I don’t think Rhett Reese or Paul Wernick cared either, they just wanted to see things in a zombie movie, we sort of haven’t seen yet. Zombieland is full of wit and comedy, but don’t go on calling it an American Shaun of the Dead, because that isn’t a correct analogy. Yes, both are very funny, but Zombieland differs greatly because it just wants to have some schizophrenic fun. Throughout the film, we get these reminders of Jesse Eisenberg’s Columbus rules. Big, bold text pops up as he follows his rules, and it’s clever, funny, and a great way of establishing the character, as well as the rules of the film.

We love zombies, and I think Zombieland understands that. They give us the one thing all zombie fans want, and that’s inventive kills. The kills are a blast, ranging from a banjo or a car door to the head to zombies falling off of amusement park rides, the make-up FX team proves that there’s a million ways to a kill a zombie. Truly the best part of Zombieland is a special cameo that I won’t spoil. If anything, this cameo shows why the script is so funny that it got these actors involved.

I’m an old school zombie fan. My zombie tastes range from White Zombie (1932) to Dawn of the Dead (1978) to Fido, and I can proudly recommend that Zombieland will have a special place in our zombie movie loving hearts. To my undead boys and girls, get ready for a new classic.

Rule #33: Go see Zombieland. Twice.

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