A Perfect Getaway – Review

Begrudgingly, I must outright say that there are too many things wrong with A Perfect Getaway. From the ads, it looked like a generic thriller with a decent cast, but it winded up being an exercise in tedium, a slow, direction less thriller. In itself, that’s a key problem. Thrillers are meant to keep us intrigued, or on the edge-of-our-seat, but A Perfect Getaway might bring some viewers to sleep. None of this should have happened. The film’s director, David Twohy, has been quite since Chronicles of Riddick was met with a lukewarm reception from critics, audiences, and even the studio five whole years ago, but it still was a good film. His eye has left him here, another sad problem for this film, crafting an ugly looking film.

So what I meant by begrudgingly, is that I didn’t want to sound off on A Perfect Getaway, since I have enjoyed most of Twohy’s films. I wanted to rally behind this thriller, and thus I cannot. I’m sorry, Mr. Twohy.

The film follows three couples. One is the idealistic newly weds (Steve Zahn and Milla Jovovich), who are going on their honeymoon here. Another couple (Timothy Olyphant and Kiele Sanchez) are vacationing too, but something seems slightly off about them. The final couple, there clearly is something wrong with them, and our foils to the cute newly weds. Everyone will clash, nobody will trust nobody.

But there is a catch. Steve Zahn’s character of Cliff is a screenwriter. Finding this out, Olyphant’s character Nick, and he is kind of opportunistic. They start rattling off ideas for a screenplay, and Nick misuses the word of “red herrings” by calling it “red snappers”. Cliff kindly corrects him. So now the film becomes self-aware, and this should be your clue to something is amidst. Fine, it’s a thriller, and this is what thriller’s do. Now Alfred Hitchcock might be the master of red herrings, only because he can always give us a trail of bread crumbs, roping us into the mystery, slowly, but keeping the twist or the said mystery secret, until he is ready to reveal it. Twohy haphazardly handles this, possibly knowing that he wasn’t leaving bread crumbs, he spins everything a complete 180 degrees. If you get the twist before hand, fine, it doesn’t matter. What matters is the way the twist is revealed. He showcases all of the stuff leading up to it, in a black and white flashback sequence that is way too long, and quite frankly, unbelievable. Getting back to Hitch, he uses the bread crumbs also to allow a reference point of the twist. He never just provides the twist, there was a reason. The twist is only there because Hollywood is twist happy. It’s too-on-the-nose, self-referential, hurting the already limp film.

Sometimes a film is savable, even with a weak twist, due to interesting characters or set up. A Perfect Getaway is full of schmucks and stereotypes, all of which are placed in a droll set up. Not much goes on, outside of talk that is just time filler. It’s a lazy thriller, with unlikable characters, and some ugly cinematography. I thought this was a “paradise”? I’m sorry, Mr. Twohy, but when is Riddick coming back? Soon I hope.

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