The Ugliest Motherfxxkers in Movies
With WB’s Jonah Hex coming to theaters this Friday, the character based off of the DC Comics character, is a facially scared cowboy, who has one ugly mug. Killer Film got to thinking, what other characters in movies are this ugly to look at? Dutch (Arnold Schwarzenegger) said it best to the Predator after the creature had to damasked itself for the first time in the classic 1987 film. “You’re one… ugly motherfxxker!
Taking his cue, Killer Film will look at the Ugliest Motherfxxkers in Movies. Instead of listing them as 1-10, we’ve included an “Ugly Motherfxxker Meter” that rates how ugly the character is on a 1 (being ugly enough to be on the list, but there’s way uglier out there) to 5 (ugliest motherfxxker ever). So sit back, try not to cringe, and let’s look at the Ugliest Motherfxxkers in Movies!
Fat Bastard from Austin Powers in Goldmember
This large, hairy, sweaty chicken-eating Scot is pretty disgusting. What’s worse is that he doesn’t try to hide his grotesque body. He loves he and plays with his nipples…okay, enough said, we still need to eat today.
Ugly Motherfxxker Meter: 3
Victor Crowley from Hatchet
Adam Green’s monstrous creation is a hideous slasher played by the immortal Kane Hodder. He’s hideously deformed and burnt, and who knows what he’ll look like in this Fall’s Hatchet II, but the worse thing is that he’s so ugly and you just want to run away from that face. Too bad he’ll likely catch up with you in like 3 seconds!
Ugly Motherfxxker Meter: 4
Pat Riley from It’s Pat
Um, what is it? *shivers*
Ugly Motherfxxker Meter: 2.5
Predator from Predator
I guess, since Arnold dubbed him what the title of this article is, its sort of the O.G. of ugly motherfxxkers. Its insect like appearance is something only a mother can love, and while there’s uglier character here, the best hunter the galaxy has to offer, had to be on here.
Ugly Motherfxxker Meter: 2.5
Darth Vader from Star Wars-Episode VI: Return of the Jedi
For the first two Original Trilogy films, Vader was this cold, calculating menace, who Obi-Wan said was viciously injured. When he redeems himself at the end of Jedi, Luke removes his mask for our first glimpse of Anakin. We get this old, blue-looking man, with a bald head, and some infections going on just past the top of his head. WTF? Gross.
Ugly Motherfxxker Meter: 2
John Merrick from The Elephant Man
Yes, it’s touchy with this pick, since there are people who suffer from elephantiasis, but we can”t help it. Lynch’s great film is quite an emotional journey for both John and the audience, but even when he yells “I am not an elephant! I am not an animal! I am a human being! I am a man!“, we still cringe. Sorry, buddy, we know, but you’re still so damn ugly.
Ugly Motherfxxker Meter: 4
Jason Voorhees from Friday the 13th-Part VII: The New Blood
Poor Kane Hodder. He’s listed twice on this list, but even though Jason Voorhees has showed a variety of different looks over the course of this series, in New Blood, we get this hideous zombie, down syndrome looking thing, that not only scares the life out of Tina, it also scared us!
Ugly Motherfxxker Meter: 3.5
Belial Bradley from Basket Case films
Imagine ladies, that you’re pregnant, happy, looking forward to the little one, and when you finally give birth, this comes out! Thank goodness for condoms! Eww!
Ugly Motherfuxxker Meter: 5
Mason Verger from Hannibal
Usually Hannibal Lecter ate his victims, but in Ridley Scott’s adaptation of Thomas Harris third Lecter book, we are presented with the only living victim, a rich brat by the name of Mason. He brutally carved his face off and we’re left to look at that mug. Even Hannibal is taken back by Mason’s appearance.
Ugly Motherfxxker Meter: 4.5
Lotney ‘Sloth’ Fratelli from The Goonies
Call the Child Protection Service, because we’re forced to look at that fugly face because his Ma dropped him on too many times. At least, he’s a soft, sweet guy…just turn the other way, please.
Ugly Motherfxxker Meter: 4
So how will Jonah Hex stand up in this list? I guess we will have to find out in theaters. Agree? Disagree? Did we miss an ugly motherfxxker? Comment below and/or included your own Ugly Motherfxxker Meter for these characters and yours!
38 Comments
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What about Danny Trejo of “Machete?” He’s pretty ugly. And because you featured “Pat,” you should probably add the ogre Shrek.
Shrek is too lovable to be included. Trejo is pushing it, because I didn’t want to hurt actors feelings!
Julia Sweeney has feelings, too.
LadyR3D Reply:
June 20th, 2010 at 10:14 am
but she don’t look like that…..
What about The Toxic Avenger? The “Hideously Deformed Creature of Superhuman Size and Strength”?
Brad Reiter Reply:
June 17th, 2010 at 6:18 pm
Good pick, Ryan.
Jon Reply:
June 18th, 2010 at 8:46 am
Damn! Toxie is a great pick, sir!
These are some ugly motherf—ers lol!
the short lady from poltergise might rank up there.
Jon Reply:
June 18th, 2010 at 8:46 am
OMG! Poor thing!
Tom Reply:
June 20th, 2010 at 7:07 am
Speaking of old ladies, how about the gypsy in Drag Me to Hell?
Jon Reply:
June 20th, 2010 at 7:10 am
Especially when she gum-attacks the girl in the car! Good call!
Cathy Reply:
June 20th, 2010 at 2:06 pm
I thought about her too!
Hedorah from ‘Godzilla vs. Hedorah’ and the aliens from ‘District 9′.
Brad Reiter Reply:
June 18th, 2010 at 7:15 am
I kind of thought the baby alien was adorable.
Jon Reply:
June 18th, 2010 at 8:45 am
Hedorah is a good pick.
Tom Reply:
June 20th, 2010 at 7:06 am
Matt, speaking of aliens, how about the ones in Carpenter’s The Thing?
If we opened this to television I’d pick the mother from the X-Files episode “Home”.
Jon Reply:
June 18th, 2010 at 9:09 pm
That’s a nice obscure reference.
Sickest article ever!
Jon Reply:
June 18th, 2010 at 11:37 pm
Thanks! Any recommendations?
TimmyL Reply:
June 20th, 2010 at 7:09 am
The bums in Street Trash!
Jon Reply:
June 20th, 2010 at 7:11 am
Or the baby in Eraserhead!
how about Zoanoid from Guyver???
what about Dark Overlord in Howard the Duck????
Ephialtes of Trachis in 300- that ugly hunchback guy.
Sloth is by far the ugliest mf that I can remmber from my youth. After that movie I could never eat antoher “Baby Rooth” in my life.
Jon Reply:
June 20th, 2010 at 8:41 am
Oh my God, that’s going to be stuck in my head now.
Or the dad/king character in Braveheart,w ho had lepursy
Jon Reply:
June 20th, 2010 at 5:20 pm
He had that yellow crap hanging around and that big, red alcoholic nose; yep, ugly.
Gollum from Lord of the Rings to me is an ugly mf’er.
my sister in law says…. Freddy Kruger
Jon Reply:
June 20th, 2010 at 9:34 pm
Why not? Outside of 5-7, he’s look has always been disgusting, plus we do have Jason on here.
Dan Aykroyd as Judge Alvin ‘J.P’ Valkenheiser in NOTHING BUT TROUBLE. Penis looking nose and all.
Jon Reply:
June 21st, 2010 at 7:16 am
Obscure reference; I like.
How about Two-Face from ‘The Dark Knight’ and maybe ‘Batman Forever’.
Jon Reply:
June 21st, 2010 at 10:36 pm
Especially, in TDK-gross.
The cannibals in Hills Have Eyes remake.